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Minneapolis-St. Paul

Naked mannequins, a hearse, & misc. messitude

Things got a little weird at Dunn Brothers yesterday.

I first noticed a naked, oddly painted mannequin on the balcony of the apartment above the café.
Dunn Brothers
Then, when I got inside of the café, I set my stuff down and went towards the restroom. I opened the door and surprised a little old man who apparently didn’t know how to work the door lock. I was horrified. I quickly closed the door as he started peeing on the wall in shock. SO embarrassing.

I then sat back down and recognized a nearby gay couple. They were at this Dunn Brothers cafe the last time I was here, last September.

They are an odd couple, not only because one of them looks like Tracy Morgan, but because they had one those “status of the relationship/our feelings” conversations that is WAY too intimate for a crowded café. It was gloriously awkward, and my friend Mike and I were amused.

So of course, five months later, I run into this same couple in the middle of the very same awkwardly intimate conversation. Déjà vu!

A hearse pulled  into the parking lot as I left the cafe.
Dunn Brothers
There was blood (hopefully) painted on the back window of the hearse, which was driven by a soda-toting hipster who I’m pretty sure lives in the naked-mannequin apartment. Somehow that’s not surprising.

We had a mannequin as our floor mascot in the dorms one year. The freshmen found it in South Beach, brought it back to campus in cab, and clothed it with stolen clothes from the laundry room. It rotated from room to room, and was pretty random, and fun. I kinda want a mannequin now…

4 Comments

  • Brandon
    March 2, 2010 at 9:42 pm

    Which one of the dorms were you in? I go to the dining hall daily by, Hecht, I believe it’s called. All those kids seem so tame! I can’t imagine ever doing something fun like bringing in a mannequin.

    Reply
    • Jansen
      March 3, 2010 at 8:04 am

      The kids are off-the-freaking chain. DO NOT be fooled.

      I have lived and worked in every dorm except for Stanford, but I was based in Hecht for 3 years. And yes, things got crazy and smelly.

      Reply
  • The Uptown Brothel
    March 30, 2016 at 10:16 am

    […] mentioned the café before because of the odd naked mannequin in the back: Well, after the story of the brothel broke, the people who live up there put a sign on their […]

    Reply
  • […] Wait, what? Mannequins and hearses… okay. […]

    Reply

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