So the leasing office is in an alleyway and partially hidden by a dumpster. I walk up to the door. It’s locked, but I see people inside so I knock.
A Somali man opens the door and shoots me the “wtf?” look. I ask for Jeff. He points to another guy, who isn’t Jeff. I repeat my question. Guy #2 points to an woman at a small desk (also not Jeff!) The woman is cussing someone out on the phone.
Angry Receptionist: “LISTEN LADY! It’s not happening today! We have over sixty properties and I’m the only one working. I have eight people in the office right now and it’s 10 till 5. You’re not getting a showing today call back... okay, I understand, but it’s not happening. Again. We are busy… what? Hey look – I’m assisting you the best I can right now. If you have a problem then take it up with management or rent else where. Bye.”
It was a really small room. There were six Somali men and me. The two oldest Somalis were filling out leases. I stood with the younger ones as we watched receptionist’s bitchfit.
The receptionist hangs up and then turns to me. “Hi. Can I help you?”
I’m uber-cautious not to become the next victim. I quietly tell her I’m here to drop off my lease application. My tone? Please don’t throw the phone at me…thanks.
The receptionist seemed relieved that I spoke English. She explained the deposit procedure to me and snapped at the Somalis as I wrote my checks:
Angry Receptionist: “Wait, how many people are living with you? So it’s you, your brother, your friend…and? Wait,…that does not go on that line. . . wait, I have a call.”
(She picks up her cell)
Angry Receptionist: “Oh yeah, so I normally wouldn’t do this but I was too lazy to go outside so I smoked in the apartment…. yeah, I had a fan blowing it outside. It didn’t smell like smoke did it? OH GOOD!”
I stood there, smirking, like, “lady, you just made the blog…”
A few minutes later I put my security deposit down. I’m going to move into my very first aparment soon! Now all that’s left is to get some furniture, and of course, the dog!
Jansen is gonna make it after all…chachacha…cha!