I ran into The Graces this morning.
The Graces are my neighborhood’s shockingly inappropriate trio of women. The Graces are like Matryoshka dolls: one is obese, another is chubby, and one is normal-sized.
I walked by the Graces on this morning’s dog walk. It’s 10am and the Graces are sitting on a retention wall passing a bottle of liquor1 when Chubby Grace spots my dog:
Chubby Grace: “Dog!”
Normal Grace: “Yes. A dog.”
Chubby Grace: “That’s a big dog.”
Obese Grace: “Sure is! Tee hee hee!”
Chubby Grace: “And the dog has an asshole!”
Obese and Normal Grace are occupied with the bottle.
Chubby Grace is transfixed on my dog’s butt.
I am uncomfortable.
Me: “Hm. I don’t know how to respond to that….but …have a great day!”
Harley and I scamper off, leaving the Graces with their bottle.
What the hell neighborhood. What. The. Hell.
1 Yes, at 10am on a Sunday. And this is odd because the bottle was in a brown bag and the liquor stores are closed on Sundays.