Law School – 1L Archives - Page 5 of 10

On Friday

May 2, 2009

I started Friday in a small interrogation room at the downtown police station.¹ It was a follow up interview about the shooting, and taped preserve my lack-of-helpfulness for posterity:
Me: “Well, I was shot in the back while crossing Hennepin.”
Detective: “Draw a map.”
Me: “Uh, well, okay…this is Hennepin…and this is the club, and this is the library. And this is where I got shot…”
Detective: “What is that cross street?”
Me: “Uh… no idea.”

(later on)

Detective: “So you were with T. and Eric.”
Me: “Yes.”
Detective: “Was T. having any relationship problems? Would any ex-boyfriends be upset that you were hanging out with her?”
Me: “…upset that she’s hanging out with a bunch of gay guys?”
After the interview I promised the detective that I would ask the doctors if they can take out the bullet. I prefer that the bullet collect dust in some evidence archive than stay lodged in my side.
Detective: “You should get it taken out while you still have insurance.”
Me: “Oh, well, I’m not planning on becoming uninsured any time soon…”
Detective: “But you weren’t planning on getting shot either.”
True.

As I walked back to the parking garage I called my insurance provider. I wanted to know if taking the bullet out (after the doctors said to leave it in) would qualify as elective surgery.
Insurance lady: “Uh, Mr. Jansen, your policy expired in 2006.”
WHAT? I did some quick mental math on how long it would take me to repay the medical bills. Not as long as it will take to repay my law school loans …but still! Ack! I called mom and asked her about the policy.
Me: “Uh, I have insurance through your work right?”
Mom: “Yep. It’s not like they would have treated you in the hospital without insurance…”
Me: “The insurance lady said my policy lapsed in 2006.”
Mom: “She’s an idiot. That’s the year they switched us over to the WhateverCare Plus plan. And you used that card at the school clinic last month remember? I’ll scan the insurance card for you…”
Whew. After my insurance scare, I went to school.

I asked my property professor’s secretary for new handouts – and yes I told the secretary that my dog ate them. After chatting with the secretaries about the perils of Mastiff-ownership, I saw the Dean of students. I spoke to the Dean last Monday, a few hours after I was released from the hospital, but I had not met with her in person yet.

I then had an interview for an orientation leader position. At UMiami they conscripted RAs to become orientation leaders. It was hilarious, and I’m sure serving as an orientation leader at the law school level will be even more fun, including the amazing awkwardness that is law school, and the inevitable “aren’t you that kid?” moments. ²

The rest of the day was hazy. I only had a good four hours of productivity and spent the rest of the time hanging out/chatting³ with Hamline students.

During my orientation leader interview I was asked “what do you do for fun?” and I said, “I hang out a lot.” – I realize that it sounds vague and stupid, but it’s true. Sitting around people watching and chatting isn’t exactly a structured activity like bowling or knitting cool things but I think it’s equally important.

¹ This is the police station within city hall. There is also a criminal justice complex right next to city hall (which presumably has police station functions too?) these distinctions obviously aren’t covered in Crimlaw or Law & Order…
² Dear 0Ls…despite the past week, Minneapolis is not as scary as Chicago…

1L Spring Finals

Not-so-vague threats?

April 30, 2009

I need everyone in Minneapolis to chill. For the next two weeks, I need the chaos to stop. Pretty please? We have stray bullets, riots, and now not-so-vague threats? What the hey?

We received this email during our Criminal Law review session:
Students, Faculty and Staff:

The University will be closing three buildings on our West Bank campus due to a time-specific threat of violence obtained by law enforcement. Those buildings include the Carlson School of Management, Hanson Hall and the Hubert H. Humphrey Center. All classes and activities beginning at or after 3:45 are cancelled in those buildings and they will close at 4:30 p.m.

This was a very specific threat of violence targeted at these three buildings. We are erring on the side of caution by canceling classes and activities and closing the buildings. UMPD is actively investigating this threat.

The Humphrey Institute’s “Changing Competitive Position of Public Research Universities” lecture has been moved to 5 Blegen Hall.

The threat was specific enough that regular operations will resume on Friday morning.

I apologize for the inconvenience and thank you for your cooperation.
UPDATE: Turns out it was a shooting threat:
The University of Minnesota closed three buildings on its West Bank campus this afternoon after a note was found saying that a shooting was planned this evening, prompting the cancellation of classes in those heavily populated buildings, school officials said. (read on)

1L Spring Finals

Riot in the neighborhood

April 30, 2009

I forgot to mention that this weekend we had a riot in Dinkytown, the legal fraternity’s neighborhood.¹ This is from the UMN student newspaper’s website:
People jumped on cars, rode in shopping carts and chanted around the fires as the evening progressed. Partygoers attempted to flip cars sporadically through the evening and harassed drivers attempting to navigate through the area.
…
About 70 officers, many clad in riot gear, were at the scene over the course of the night, Garcia said. They used various chemical irritants, including gas and spray — commonly known as tear gas and mace — as well as riot sticks and projectiles, such as foam and marking rounds, for crowd control.

Some partygoers almost immediately submitted to the officers, but many resisted, launching bottles and debris at officers and onto the fires and shooting fireworks toward police.
Full story is here. There are slideshows here and here.

Cops were apparently slow to respond, which wasn’t a surprise. A few weeks ago the sorority across the street from the Gamma house had a sprawling party. Think drunk, screaming undergrads… Krawall & Remmidemmi. The kids blocked the street, causing drivers to blare their horns at 3am…

I heard the party coming closer to the house, so I went outside to check on my car. As I opened the door two guys popped up from the side of my car, shouted “shit!” and took off running.

I called the cops.

The cops took a long time to respond and didn’t even shut down the party. Right after the police left, a train of undergrads crept from behind the sorority house and re-entered the front door. A few minutes later they left the sorority house and stood in front of the Gamma house and howled.

The party restarted, and they continued to keep our entire house awake, so I called the cops again. They never showed up the second time.

This weekend’s riots were obviously more serious than the sorority party. One of my former housemates had his windshield smashed. I wish the police would shut parties down before things like that happen.

Oh, and apparently the president of the university is very disappointed:

1L Spring Finals / dogs

The angry neighbor

April 29, 2009

My apartment building is buzzing about the angry notes taped on all of the building’s exits. Apparently someone’s dog (not mine!) peed in front of our building. And yes, the alleged pee puddle has a note taped to it as well:

I say “alleged” pee puddle because it has been there for two days now without drying. I think someone poured out some hooch or something…

One of my neighbors is definitely scared of Harley – I’m leaving my apartment to take Harley on a walk and I hear a gasp from the end of the hallway:
Neighbor-lady: “He chained? I aint walking by no big dog…”
Me: “Yes. He’s leashed. He’s really friendly too…”
Neighbor-lady: “He looks like he RIPS PEOPLE’S HEADS OFF!”
Me: “Uh… well, my head is still here!”
Later on we had a visit by a maintenance man. I held Harley’s collar and let him into the apartment.
Maintenance man: “Oh, don’t worry. I have three Anatolian mastiffs at home. They weigh twice his size. Heyah!”
I’m surprised by how many people own mastiffs, but I guess there’s not an occasion for people to mention that to a non-mastiff owner.

Harley and I passed the neighborhood elementary school on a walk this morning and a third grader insisted that Harley was a Bull-mastiff because “his cousin’s dog looks just like that.” The runt is a total 0L and he doesn’t even know it! As we walked away he screamed “AND HE LOOKS JUST LIKE YOU TOO!”

Well…gee…watch it kid. Don’t think I won’t give Michael Jackson the address of the playground…

…I was under the delusion that today would be more productive than it was. I spent the morning “running errands.”

I had to get two important things:

A coffee table, since I was sick of outlining on the couch and leaning positions aren’t exactly comfortable right now…and…
Some bitter-dog spray. Harley has developed a fondness for the string tips of my window blinds and my UMiami beach towel. The bitter-spray is the equivalent of dog mace. I smeared it on everything that shouldn’t be digested.

The spray should work because it tastes god-awful. How do I know? Well, I bought a covered push-to-open trash can so Harley-Scalia wouldn’t pilfer the garbage during the day. I sprayed some of the bitter-spray on the can and of course I FORGOT about the spray. I touched the mace-covered “open” button for the trash can…and…A few minutes later I rubbed my mouth and began five minutes of…um… French.¹

Hopefully it’s awful enough to stop a mastiff…

Harley-Scalia has also discovered how to open the toilet. If I don’t close the bathroom door then he’s guaranteed to drink out of the tiolet.

Harley thinks I don’t know about this. I was in my bedroom when I heard these HUGE gulps coming from the bathroom.

Harley heard me get up and scurried into the kitchen. He was sitting next to his dog bowl, looking at me like “What? I was SO here the whole time!”

Yeah. Huh-huh. Right.

I only got through one outline today, which was underwhelming. I had such grand plans to get two outlines done and maybe attempt to move some more stuff over…but no. Fail. One outline was all that I finished. I went to fetch more soda and found Harley inspecting my books:

I have a property practice exam at 9am tomorrow, and a Criminal Law review session shortly after that. Staying away from school until my finals? Hah. Nonsense.

More bitchy neighbor notes after the jump:

1L Spring Finals / dogs / picture of the day

Overwritten

April 28, 2009

Today was the last official day of school. There are still review sessions and group practice exams, but no more formal classes.

My classmates had a “glad you’re still alive!” card for me¹ and a big bone for Harley-Scalia:

The best part about the card was what one of the international students wrote:
“I thought you among the smartest men I’ve ever met, but now the impression is overwritten…get better soon!”
Hilarity.

It’s almost 8pm and should finish my civil procedure outline … but instead I’m going to bed.

Exam studying starts in earnest tomorrow…

¹ AND a vanilla-scented candle, since Harley-Scalia farts something vicious… you rock Cristina!

1L Spring Finals / Life / memories

Jansen gets shot

April 27, 2009

My night started at a homeless shelter and ended in the E.R.

It’s easier to write a post about this once rather than relive the “how I got shot” story for everyone who asks about it. It was a freak accident, and I was lucky not to be paralyzed or killed. I’m really just down one Hollister shirt and a blazer…and one day of studying I suppose. We’ll see how bad moving around is going to be when I wake up…

Eric wanted to go to the Gay 90’s because Sunday is that club’s busiest night. I spent most of the weekend working and moving to the new apartment, so I figured a random Sunday night at the club was warranted.

Our night started at the Minneapolis homeless shelter where we met up with Tee, who was just getting off work. (Eric volunteers at the shelter, and Tee works there full time.)

Tee insisted that she could not go to the clubhouse wearing jeans, so we took a long detour to Tee’s house where she threw on her House of Dereon dress…

I thought the night was over when we left the club, but I was wrong.

I’m walking across Hennepin Avenue with what felt like the entire hiphop room of the Gay 90’s, when I hear popping sounds.

People scream and start running.
I feel something hit my back.

I stop on the curb and call over to T.

Me: “I think I got hit.”
Tee: “Shut up, where?”
(I lift up the back of my shirt and point.)
Tee: “OH MY GOD, they got you! They shot you!”
Me: “It’s a gunshot?”
Tee: “YES! THEY GOT YOU! (then to the street) HE GOT SHOT!”

I think, “Well that’s a new one...Okay, I’m not paralyzed, so I better get to a police officer before I pass out.”

I run back across Hennepin to the cops standing on the corner.

Me: “Hey Officer,”
(Officers look at me like I’m nuts)
Me: “I think I got shot.”
(I turn around and pull up my shirt.)
Officer: “Yep. Sit down. We’ll call the ambulance.”

Tee crosses the street and starts prodding my wound for the bullet. She keeps repeating that she thinks it just grazed me. I call mom.

Mom: “Huh?”
Me: “Hey, I just got shot.”
Mom: “You just got what?”
Me: “I just got shot.”
Mom: Where?”
Me: “In front of a club.”
Mom: “Why are you out on a Sunday?”

More police come. A stranger brings me a bottle of water.

Stranger: “You are shaking because you’re losing blood. That’s why you have to drink a lot of water.”

I found out that the lady stayed and prayed for me after I left…

So it’s around 2:30 a.m. on a Monday and I’m sitting downtown bleeding on the side of the street. Random people coming from clubs stop as they see the blood coming from my back. This isn’t cute. I had a pretty good idea that I was going to miss this morning’s civil procedure class…
The ambulance comes and the paramedics spend time stabbing me with needles and tubes, and ask if I have any allergies every five minutes.
I arrive at the E.R. and meet a team of people who will stab me with more tubes and ask whether I have allergies 10 more times.

A nurse then tells me that they are going to have to take off all my clothes. Do I have a problem with that?
Me: “I have a bullet in my back. It’s not the time for modesty.”

A few minutes later I’m covered with those wash-rag-like hospital blankets.

A homicide detective comes in and asks me a few questions.

I remind him that I’m not a homicide case yet, and that it was probably stray bullet. No, I didn’t get into a fight with anyone. No, I’m not a drug dealer or shady character. It’s not my fault, I swear.

I then get put into a room, get more tubes, and explain that I don’t have allergies a few more times.

Nurse: “We can’t tell through tests whether your lung was popped. Lung deflation is the biggest concern right now… so we are just going to have you wait for four hours and see what happens! Also, pee in this cup. We need to check if you have blood in your urine…”

Dandy.

Eric and Tee waited with me. I told them that as long as I wasn’t paralyzed that I was fine.

I just hoped that I would get out of the hospital in time to walk Harley and that this wouldn’t interfere with finals.

I also said that I didn’t mind the number they did on my shirt because I would have never gotten the blood off anyway:

Throughout the night the doctor kept vacillating between taking the bullet out and leaving it inside of me.

She finally decided to leave the bullet be, so yes I’m attending Crimlaw tomorrow with a bullet lodged in my back…

The getting shot part didn’t hurt at all because the bullet lodged right under my skin. It just felt like a hard slap on the back.

What did hurt however was when the doctor put new dressings on:

Getting shot in Minneapolis.

Oh, and when the doctor rinsed the gunshot wound it was awful. That “oh my god, why?” pain. We’ll see how I do tomorrow…

Tee has two tweens at home, so she had to leave around 4 a.m. Eric stayed with me the rest of the night. We were both cranky when I was finally let out around 9am.

I felt so trashy leaving the hospital.

The doctors cut through my shirt and undershirt at the E.R., so I was only wearing my blazer and still sporting the test/scan stickers across my chest. And yes, the blazer has a bullet hole in it.

It was not one my classier moments.

The first thing I did when I got back to the apartment was take Harley on a walk. I had been gone for almost 11 hours and fully expected to find a mastiff-sized crap in the middle of my bed…but Harley was in front of the door wagging his tail. No crap in site.

Best dog ever.

I was on the phone for most of the walk. I talked to the police, the law school, family in Germany, classmates.

I’m going to pick up my books from school whenever I get up (I’ve been awake for about 29 hours)…and I should be in class tomorrow!

Just don’t pat me on the back. Thanks.

1L Spring Finals / dogs / memories / pictures

Harley & Me

April 24, 2009

Yesterday was a bit of an adventure.

After Corporations, I noticed that I had a voicemail – it was from my new landlord. He said that my credit and criminal records came back clean, and I should come down and sign the lease.

I signed the lease after Crimlaw, and then called Harley’s foster parents.¹

I bought a leash and dog food at Wal-Mart and then took the road trip up to Pease, Minnesota.

Yes. The name of the town was Pease. There was also a “Rum River” and a town called “Wellthen.” This reminded me of the town names from the Bemidji trip…

Pease is a little country.

Okay, more than a little country. Think horses, cows, dirt roads, massive trucks, pro-life billboards, antique shops, churches that look like sheds, and holes-in-shirts.

And of course I took the wrong dirt road, but two boys got off their horses (I shit you not) and pointed me in the right direction.

The animal rescue was on a huge farm.

There were large dogs (and horses) everywhere. Some dogs caged, some were chained to posts, and others roamed around freely. I got out of the car and had two pit bulls inspect me. Harley was tied in front of the house.

After greeting the two bulls, I saw a little boy getting on a dirt bike. “You guys have a lot of dogs…” I said. “Yep,” he said. “Susan’s inside.”

Susan opened the door as I walked up the house stairs. She unchained Harley and took him inside. There were kennels stacked everywhere inside the house. There was also a bored looking pit bull, and several more excitable pit bulls in cages. Susan’s (husband?) was on the couch watching “What happens in Vegas” and the un-caged pit bull sat at his feet.

After making awkward small talk with the husband, I look over and see Susan nonchalantly pulling out a BIG HONKING needle. She told the husband to hold Harley, and then stabbed Harley’s coat with the needle. “This is his whatsit shot.”

Susan then recited a long list of Harley’s recent shots and treatments – “if he starts pooping out worms that’s perfectly normal. It’s really good actually.”

Oh my goodness.

After twenty minutes I was speeding back down the dirt roads with Harley in the back seat.²

I then drove fifty miles West and visited Phillip in St. Cloud. He introduced me to his cats, housemate, and her rabbits. His housemate owns two rabbits and spins yarn out of their hair, which is just about the most random, and coolest thing ever.

The drive back to Minneapolis was about 80 miles.

We stopped in Monticello where Harley got another potty break and a chicken nugget. Once we got back to civilization Minneapolis, I walked Harley around Dinkytown, picked up a few things from the Gamma house and then drove back to my new apartment.

I planned on sleeping on a self-inflating travel bed that my mother bought for me last summer. But, of course my “convenient self-inflating bed” was not so convenient. The pump requires two huge batteries, not included.

So I spent my first night on an area rug with Harley sleeping nearby.

This morning I took Harley on his first walk in the new neighborhood.

The neighborhood is gorgeous and has an odd mix if old mansions, historic churches, and apartment buildings.

Harley is really calm, so I didn’t have to worry about him lunging at people.
He does however sort of run into me when I’m walking him, like, “Oh, sorry, I want to go to the other side of the sidewalk and I forgot you were there.”

I also need to work on fattening him up:

I’m not too thrilled about the visible ribs.

This means that reinforcing good behavior with treats is completely acceptable for at least the first month.

Although I’m still getting used to the drool (mostly after he drinks water), I think Harley was a good pick.

¹ I decided not to get Tula (the pit bull) because I felt that mom’s reaction (OH MY GOD AHH!) was indicative of the general-animus towards pits, and I wasn’t prepared to spend the next 10 years fighting that stereotype.
² One neat thing that Susan gave me was a dog-seatbelt for the car.

1L Fall finals / dogs

Tula or Harley?

April 22, 2009

Barring any shenanigans, I move out this Friday.

This makes me so happy I feel like hopping around my room screaming “YES WE CAN” like Kyle’s dad.

I’ve been racking up extra hours (at work and outlining) so I can afford to take the weekend off for the move. The move shouldn’t be too bad because I don’t own any of the furniture in my fraternity room…

…which means a trip to Ikea.

The apartment is really out of my hands at the moment – the landlord is doing the obligatory criminal and credit check. And, again, barring any shenanigans (ie someone stole my identity and ruined my credit) things should be fine.

Today’s task was getting serious about finding a dog. I filled out the applications and did the follow-ups… and there are two finalists at the moment:
Tula

Harley

Tula is a pitbull. Harley is a mastiff.

There are pros and cons for each dog.

Tula pros:

Friendly
Cheaper monthly expenses (smaller dog)
High energy, but not a spaz (good running dog!)
Used to being inside
Well behaved

Tula cons:

Pitbulls have an extremely bad reputation
Mom wigged out ala, “OH MY GOD I WILL NEVER VISIT YOU IF YOU GET THAT DOG!”
Tula’s mom isn’t a 110% sure that Tula is house broken

Harley pros:

Friendly
Mastiff is my dream dog
Potty trained
Less likely to destroy furniture

Harley cons:

More expensive (monthly costs, bigger dog)
Foster parent hasn’t been as communicative with me, so I’m relying more on the advertisements for the dog.
Mastiffs SNORE…

I know what I’m getting with Tula, whereas with Harley…hm. While I don’t think it would be a disaster per se, Harley is definitely more of a wild card. Oh what ever shall I do?

Tula or Harley?

1L Spring Finals

You want a piece of me?

April 22, 2009

Professor P describes the exam:
Jack: “What makes a good exam answer? Like what are you looking for?”
Professor P: “Well, one of the questions is going to ask for a piece of you. You have to be original and creative…”
Jill: “A piece of me? Can I just attach a hair or something?”
Professor P: “Uh, I was thinking of an intellectual piece.”

Law School / Law School – 1L / on the record

Jill on Backpacks

April 16, 2009

Today, before the start of Crimlaw:

Jack: “Are you looking at my rolly backpack?”
Jill: “Yes. And judging accordingly.”
Jack: “What? I got it for my birthday and I’m so excited about it.”
Jill: “That’s nice.”
Jack: “…I just got sick of carrying so much shit around. I had so many bags and I looked like a homeless person.”
Jill: “You can buy cute bags though. Note my big purse and briefcase. Or, you can try using your locker for books you don’t need.”
Jack: “And I just want my rolly backpack to be socially acceptable!”
Jill: “It never will be.”

Law School – 1L

Oh my

April 16, 2009

Two weeks before finals:

…all my class notes…gone?

Law School – 1L

Perfect day

April 14, 2009

Today was the perfect day.
I got up at 5am, folded laundry, and then went to the gym.

Around 7:30 I was at school and read until Civil Procedure. After Civpro I went home, made lunch, and read some mo’.

After property¹ I went drove to work and worked until 8:30ish. And of course, there was the usual sing-a-long on the way home. ²

Nothing extraordinary happened today. What made today perfect was how smoothly things went. I had the day planned out in 30 minute increments and finished everything that I wanted to do…

…there were no “WHAT? WHERE DID THE PAST X-number OF HOURS GO?” moments. And in law school, that’s an accomplishment.³ Let’s see if I can repeat this tomorrow.

¹ Which has become the longest, most tedious class ever by the way…
² Song of the night was “Zero” by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.
³ I’ve had too many of those horrifying “I just lost 3 hours in a time warp” moments. I suspect the missing time goes to BritBrit’s rehab…

Law School – 1L

Yes, six.

April 10, 2009

So I walk up to the Caribou counter,
Me: “May I have a large dark roast with room for cream?”
Barista: “Sure, anything else?”
Me (pulling out tumbler): “Yes, may I have a latte with six shots of espresso in the tumbler?”
Barista (gasping): “You want what?”
Me: “A latte with six shots.”
Barista: “How many?”
Me: “Six.”
Barista: “Six?”
Me: “Yes. Six. I basically want you to fill up this tumbler with espresso and put a dash of milk on top for show.”
The cashier-Barista gives me a filthy look and then puts the order in. There was another Barista who was making the drinks. The drink-maker looked at her order screen and gasped.
Drink-Barista: “He wants what?”
Cashier-Barista (calling over): “Six shots.”
Drink-Barista: “Six shots?!”
Cashier-Barista: “Yes.”
Drink-Barista: “Of espresso?”
Me: “Yes. Of espresso. Don’t judge.”
And no, I’m not crazy.

My new tumbler¹ actually keeps beverages hot. Plus, milk at my job is free.²

So the purpose of getting a 6-shot latte for the tumbler and a normal cup filled with coffee is that I can make lattes on my own without having to run back to the store throughout the night. So it’s really only like order 3 lattes over a 6 hour period… which isn’t that bad. Or so I tell myself…

¹ This is my new tumbler. My old Starbucks tumbler was horrible. It constantly spit out liquid even when “shut.” It was like coffee volcano.
² The cafeteria has those lift-the-lever dispensers.

Law School / Law School – 1L / on the record

Jack’s here.

April 10, 2009

We had another “what are the odds” moment in Corporations:

Professor M“Jimmy Smith?”
(Silence…crickets…)
Professor M“No? Not here?” Um…okay. How about Sara Johnson?”
Jill“She’s not here.”
Professor M“Wow. Well, uh. That’s odd. I mean, most of you are here… what about, Jack Thompson?”
Jack“Here.”
Professor M“Haha. Good! Well, I guess it’s bad luck for you….”

Law School – 1L

My first oral argument

April 1, 2009

I had my first oral argument yesterday. It was a ‘practice‘ argument in front of my legal writing professors, but still formal enough to require a suit and a leather folder. Fancy. I know.

The real argument is next week. We will argue before clerks who will act as “guest judges.”

I am lucky enough to be paired with someone who has the same understanding of the assignment: We both view the oral argument as a “conversation with the court” and not a gunfight at the judicial O.K. Corral.

We “served” each other with updated briefs, and kept the other aware of our prep time. This is why we addressed the same issues and didn’t talk past each other in court. No blood letting, or bitchyness. Our reputations are intact.¹

Other students aren’t so lucky. The worst rumor is that a student² has spent 10-hours- per-minute preparing for the oral argument. It’s a 10 minute argument… so yeah, that’s 100 hours. I refuse to believe that. Because, well, that’s sad.³

Although the oral argument is was a lot of fun, I am still petitioning journals instead of applying to moot court. I think a journal will let me explore the academic side of law.

I figure I can get my practical experience through internships and volunteering. And besides, if both of the journals I petition for reject me, I’ll end up in the general moot court anyway. So there’s a chance I’ll have another oral argument sooner than I think.

¹ The people who get into nasty, unnecessarily competitive bitch-fights with opposing counsel are ridiculed accordingly. I think part of performing well in law school, at least at UMinnesota, is not alienating your peers with your drama.
² Jill.
³ I’m all about being thoroughly prepared, but there are so many better uses for 100 hours worth of time, ie, outlining, networking, working out, having a life…etc. Plus I doubt an attorney (esp. in a Criminal law case like ours) has 100 hours to practice a 10 minute oral argument, unless it’s before the Supreme Court…even then…and its a pass/fail course by the way.

Law School – 1L

The Holland & Knight Smear campaign

March 27, 2009

There is a very interesting bit of legal investigative journalism over at Karasma Media.

The gist: There’s a very active twitter account called hklaw that is actually part of an online smear campaign¹ against the Chicago-based law firm, Holland & Knight.

Hklaw has followed my twitter account, and I suspect it adds all of the lawyers and law students it can find.

The Hklaw twitter account and associated blawgs dominate the online conversation about Holland & Knight, and it’s all negative. Kara Smith has hopefully put a stop to this by emailing the marketing department at Holland & Knight.

But I wonder if it’s too late. If the H&K marketing department was unaware of this then they probably are too technologically behind to fix it.

Hklaw was my first exposure to the law firm. I wonder if that’s true for others.

Kara Smith drives the point home:
“Legal marketers, if you are not at the forefront of your online conversation someone else is going to be. I can not stress this enough. Obviously, now is not the time to be cutting back on your firm’s social media budget and be caught with your guard down. Law firms, if you’ve been skeptically sitting back on your heels waiting for evidence to prove social media’s viability for the legal industry, the jury’s verdict has just come in.”
Read Smith’s full post here.

¹ Or as they call it, “an investigation.”

Law School – 1L

Suicide Fail.

March 26, 2009

Attempted suicide turns into police chase.
In a suicide attempt, appellant Aaron Patrick Olson swallowed 25 Valium pills and parked his car in a quiet, undeveloped neighborhood in Shakopee. Olson made several telephone calls to his wife and friends, announcing his intention to kill himself, hinting at his location, and stating that he would flee if police were sent. Olson’s wife notified police, who went in search of Olson.

Law School – 1L

Thinking like a lawyer?

March 19, 2009

I came home from work yesterday and opened my car trunk to fetch my laptop bag.
I love the trunk of my car. It’s clean and smells amazing because I spilled an entire bottle of febreeze in it…

In my trunk is a big plastic bin where I keep my car-stuff: windshield wiper fluid, sanitary wipes, car brush…etc.

The lid was off the bin and I noticed the label for the first time:

Now, if I had seen this last week I would have sat in the middle of my driveway and laughed. But after reading Termination of Parental Rights¹ cases for the past week, I thought, “Oh, that label is a good idea!”

The thinking like a lawyer bit? I think that happened today.

¹ Aka, real-life horror stories. Seriously. These cases are a hot mess… the parents are a mix of Amy Winehouse and 50 Cent, minus the record deals.

Law School – 1L

Final Deliberations (and the Cake!)

March 12, 2009

I just finished a marathon 6-hour meeting for the Student Service Fees Committee.

This was the scene in hour 5:

Yes. I think that’s Ben¹ sleeping.

The meeting passed my 9pm guestimate, but it was still significantly shorter than last year’s deliberations, which went until 3am. These are the final deliberations for the Student Services Fee Committee. A lot of money is at stake so spirited debate² ensued…

The debate was interrupted by a laughing fit in my corner of the conference table because of The Amazing:

I realize that the cake looks less-than-amazing in that picture, but it was a Dairy Queen ice cream cake before I demolished it. And it was amazing. Seriously. Angels sung. It was the kind of cake that changes lives. The cake was good enough to promote world peace. That cake could even make Chris Brown stop beating Rihanna.³

A committee member caught me casting amorous looks at my leftover cake and started laughing. And of course, I started giggling too.⁴
Committee Chair (annoyed, on 3 hours of sleep): “What is going on down there?”
Me (flustered): “Sorry, I’m going through things. This cake is so good.”
Committee member: “Yeah, he’s like in love with it.”
Another Committee member (Ben): “You should blog about it!”
I pull out my camera, and the Committee Chair rolls her eyes in disgust.⁵

We started around 5pm, and ended after 11pm. I’m tired, goofy, and still gitty from that cake.

¹ For the record Ben’s not actually sleeping, although we did catch him not paying attention during one resolution. Hm hm hm. Pesky laptops! Ben is also the person who suggested I take a picture of The Amazing.
² Who caught the Pelosi quote? (She’s been using the phrase for a while.)
³ Yeah, I went there.
⁴ I realize this sounds grossly unprofessional, but it’s not. I swear. This is a relaxed student committee. To put this in context, the entire committee had all just finished watching David After Dentist and Scarlet Takes a Tumble about 5 minutes before. Classy, I know. But it was a 6-hour meeting and we needed breaks.
⁵ Yes, you did!

Law School – 1L

Um, I need a 3D.

March 8, 2009

I’m a bright cookie:
Me: “Excuse me, I need help with the batteries.”
Saleswoman: “Yes?”
Me: “I just bought a doorbell but I forgot the battery. The package says I need a 3-D battery, but I only see 4D, 7D, and 8D.”
Saleswoman: “Um, the number stands for the number of batteries in the package dear.”
Me: “Oooooooh.”