Law school is about free food

The law school can sense when I am cranky. I was sitting in the law school cafeteria when got an instant message from Jack. He was in class, and another chair had just collapsed.

This happened to me last year:

Fail.

I was going to write a post about the ridiculous spending patterns at the law school: we have a student lounge with a flat screen TV, pool table, and video game machines, but our classrooms smell¹, the seats collapse, and the temperature control is underwhelming. A can of febreeze would do far more good than a pinball machine.

So, I started writing my cranky post when the administrator in charge of orientation² came by my table and gave me a handwritten thank you note and Take 5 candy bar for serving as an orientation leader.

Then, on my way to class, the Lexis representative had a spread of (good) candy and muffins. She was busy and tired, so I didn’t even have to talk to her to get the food…although I did tell her how much I loved Best Authority.
Muffin and candy bar in hand, law school was suddenly awesome. Who cares that that the class rooms smell like snot? They feed me!
I walk into my Conflicts class full of sugary goodwill and see Jill:

Me: “The Lexis lady has free muffins and candy bars!”
Jill: “WHAT?”
Me: “Free food! The Lexis lady is giving out muffins and candy. And you don’t even have to talk to her. It’s amazing.”
Jill: “You mean she’s giving away muffins ON THE DAY OF THE WLSA BREAST CANCER BAKE SALE?! That bitch!”
Me: “I was just trying to spread the good word…”

Jill stifles a scream then storms out of the room.

Woops.

¹ I suspect they don’t shampoo the carpet.
² Aka, the “go to” lady who everyone loves.