Before the fiasco in St. Paul – most of the Gamma house went to trivia night at Burrito Loco. Pictures!
The best part of the night was when the DJ played “Walk it out.” Yes, a bunch of over-dressed law students were walking it out at a Burrito Loco on a Wednesday night.
We two-stepped. People stared. It was hilarious. This is what we do.
Professor T: “Judicial activism is a pejorative term people use to describe supreme court rulings they don’t like.”
Con Law began with this quote:
“Despite what Hollywood might have you believe, in situations like this you don’t call in the tough guys; you all in the lawyers.” – George Tenet
Haaa-CHO!
(There’s a boy in the back of the class that lets out these extra-loud sneeze-cough combos…) Jill: “His sneezes are like an assault my senses every time…”
War Powers Resolution of 1973:
Jack: “It makes the president the commander-in-chief of a Cinderella army that disappears in 60 days.”
As if you don’t have enough cases to read… here is one I truly enjoyed…
Court of Criminal Appeals of Texas. WILSON
v.
STATE.
Nov. 15, 1893.
Appeal from district court, Gonzales county; T. H. Spooner, Judge.
Reeves Wilson was convicted of manslaughter, and appeals. Reversed.
HURT, P. J.
There was a dance at the house on S. Winkfield’s farm in Gonzales county on the night of the 26th of November, 1892. The deceased, Bagley, was the “fiddler;” and while “playing the fiddle,” there being quite a number of ladies present, Steve Wilson (brother of appellant) came into the room, and began cursing and using vulgar language.
Bagley requested him to stop using such language in presence of the ladies, whereupon Steve said, “If you think you can make me stop, you had better try it.” Bagley got up, fiddle in hand, and placed one hand on Steve, and said, “You ought not to do that way.”
They then struck one or two blows, when defendant and his brother Sam came up, defendant striking Bagley on the head with a large rock, and some one stabbing him with a knife, inflicting a mortal wound. Some of the witnesses saw the knife before Sam struck deceased, and some did not. No witness swears that appellant saw the knife.
Professor C: “When you sign a contract you should read the damn thing.”
Professor C: “Why is it in capitals? That’s the insurer’s way of getting around the reasonable expectation policy. They’ll say, “What do you mean you didn’t know?! It’s in CAPITALS!” but of course the problem is that half the freakin’ document is in capitals…”
Professor T’s world:
Professor T: “Up where I live there are guns going off all the time. I have to put an orange vest on my dog when I let him out in the morning because hunters will shoot at anything that moves...”
I don’t really believe in Karma, but let’s call it that anyway: last night was a study in schadenfreude. I watched B. Scott’s commentary video on “Scarlet Takes a Tumble” about four times. I showed it to housemates. We laughed. I was on the floor crying with laughter at one point. Yes it was that serious…
“Scarlet Takes a Tumble” is the new viral-video-of-the-moment. It features an overweight girl singing. Scarlet gets up, put some heels on, and stands on a coffee table.
And then, of course, one-two-three WHAM! She falls. It’s hilarious. It is. Actually, it’s not as funny as B. Scott’s commentary video. Watch it. You’ll understand.
So, the little Karma Buddha in the sky, (or in Wisconsin, however this thing works…) took note. Karma Buddha saw me on the ground laughing at Scarlet and her misfortune, and he said, “Beyotch, I shall smite thine ass.”
Today I got my comeuppance: I’m cycling back to school after eating lunch at home. I’m biking on the sidewalk and approach 10th avenue. There is a church-like-thing on the corner with an extremely high yard that comes down to meet the sidewalk. The yard of the church is so high that it obscures the 10th avenue sidewalk, so I couldn’t see the easel for Burrito Loco(a local restaurant), which was in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk, right around the corner…
I see the easel. I brake. My tires slip on the leaves and then catch. I fly over my bicycle and PANCAKE ON THE GROUND, VAM! and my bike crashes on top of me…
A biker across the street comes over, “Oh my god! Are you alright!?”
I mumble something and scramble to save my coffee tumbler from rolling into the street. I then thank the biker for his concern and try to find my water bottle, which flew somewhere…
I finally find my water bottle when another biker with wild red hair comes up. “Dude! That was the COOLEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN!”
“Why thank you,” I said. At least someone thought impromptu flight lesson was que badass. I then booked it across the bridge to torts.
So dear Karma Buddha, dear KB, or B-town, or whatever you’re called. I get it. Nice one. But Scarlet’s tumble is still hilarious.
I looked outside of my window and thought, “Oh, it’s starting to rain.”
Then a drop did this little loop motion as if it say, “Are you sure? Really?”
And then it hit me, “WOAH! ITS SNOWING!”
The house across the street:
On close up:
Apparently it’s not snowing hard enough to just capture in a normal photograph, but trust. That’s Santa-rain right there – that’s snow! (And a big honking deal if you just spent the past 7 years in Miami.) Woot! Time to call madre!
Halloween is here, and yes, that means another installment of the SAW franchise. I watched SAW V today with a housemate at the Mall of America.
It was a typical SAW movie…you know, Hostel meets The Departed. And it’s not exactly scary… it’s basically a more gory, less-plot driven version of Thomas Harris story. It’s not a waste of money but not amazing either.
The best thing about the movie is that Meagan Good is in it.
Today in Civ Pro we picked apart a (extremely) poorly written answer to a complaint. Giant fail.
Professor V: We see that the complaint has a lot of problems, but it seems like the defendant wasn’t even trying to get it right. I asked the clerk of the court if this was typical, and she said that there was a deep divide: 90% of the pleadings were perfect, and 10% were absolutely dreadful. This obviously falls into the dreadful category, but that makes it an awfully good learning tool.
An example of the absurdity… the defendant, Southwestern Publishing Company, denied this part of the Plaintiff’s claim:
IV.
Defendant, The Southwestern Company, engages in the business of publishing and selling books to residential customers. Defendant contracts with college students to spend their summers selling its books from door to door in residential areas selected by Defendant.
Okay, now this is from Southwestern’s website:
Students who participate in the program represent approximately 350 colleges and universities from the United States, Canada, Europe, South Africa, and South America. Our products are sold to families in their homes by these students during their summer breaks. These students are independent contractors and have the opportunity to run their own businesses by purchasing products from Southwestern at wholesale and selling them to customers at retail.
Um…yeah.
* For you Westlaw people, the full case is at: Grewe v. Southwestern Co. Not Reported in F.Supp.2d, 2005 WL 1593048 D.Minn.,2005. but the botched answer to the amended complaint is not among the Westlaw court docs on Westlaw. Hm..
Our school has a mandatory 1L lecture series. Today’s lecturers discussed stress and stress related issues:
Speaker 1: “Don’t forget you have a life. Do not use the word “allegedly” when asked if you took out the trash. And do not take your books to Chipotle and read them in line. Have you guys seen that? Yeah? Well it’s sad.”
Speaker 1: “The second year is better. I know you hear it all the time and think “LIAR!” but it’s true. If it wasn’t better then the attrition rate would be 98%. Your second year sucks for a whole different set of reasons.”
Speaker 2: “About 10% of lawyers have alcohol abuse problems. In this room, I’d say that’s the first two rows. Sorry, I’m sure you’re great but you’re drunks. You go to a great school but you’re not that special – you’re not going to buck the statistics.”
Jill’s computer starts speaking during Professor L’s class: “CONGRATULATIONS! YOU’VE WON!”
The entire class laughs. Professor L: “I won’t even try to exercise discipline, because the embarrassment is enough. HOW EMBARRASSING!” Jill: “Sorry…I had to buy these tickets…and…” Professor L: “And apparently you’ve won something! I’m sure you’re not the only one who has done such a thing in class, you’re just the only one who has done it with the volume on!”
Professor C: “And by the way, I’m just responding to what you’re saying. If you were saying what I was saying, then I would say what you’re saying.”
Gotcha
The professor puts a slide of a statute up…
33 USC § 1321(f)(2) Liability for actual costs of removal (1) Except where anowner or operator can prove that a discharge was caused solely by
(A) an act of God,
(B) an act of war,
(C) negligence on the part of the United States Government, or…
Professor V: “Who has the burden of proof here? How do we know?” Student: Uh… (tries for several minutes to explain.) Professor V: “This one is actually so easy …that’s why you’re missing it! Let’s read the statute shall we? Except where an owner or operator can prove… hm. Seems like the statute is telling us who has the burden of proof…”
Kevin the tort-machine.
Professor T: “So, Ted, let’s say Kevin pushes you into a hole on the street. Is the creator of the hole liable?” Ted: “Why would Kevin want to push me?” Professor T: “Doesn’t matter. He does.” Kevin: “And I pushed him hard too!” Professor T: “Why is that?” Kevin: “Cus If I get sued I’m going to make it count!”
It’s all downhill from here… Professor C: “you can tell we are in the dog days of the semester because I’m no longer wearing a suit. By the end of the semester I’ll just come in a grubby t-shirt and scream “LEAVE ME ALONE!” A demand of love Professor C: “What about specific performance of personal services?” Student: “You can’t force people do things like that. It’s like forcing a marriage. You can’t force someone to love someone else…” Professor C: “DIDN’T YOU SEE FIDDLER ON THE ROOF?!” Professor C: “what if the personal services contract was to be a masseuse? You court can’t say, YOU MUST MASSAGE!” Why Jack is going to be a corporate lawyer… (Jill gives an argument) Professor C: “okay, Jack, argue in the alternative.” Jack: “I don’t know… I really liked Jill’s argument.” Professor C: “But you’re an advocate! Argue for your side!” Jack: “I…well, I just don’t know. I just really liked her argument. My argument is just not strong…” Professor C: “So you’re going to be a corporate lawyer, and not a litigator.” When butter isn’t Kosher Professor C: “In Jewish law we build a fence around the Torah. That’s why we can’t eat chicken and milk. The purpose of that law is so you don’t cook a dead baby in its mother’s milk. But chickens don’t produce milk. We still prohibit it because the value protected is so important that we prefer to have an over inclusive rule than an under-inclusive one. Student: “Does this include butter?” Professor C: “WE ARE AN OPPRESSED PEOPLE!… and yes it includes butter…” Differences in determining Burden of Proof Professor T: “Do we want to be sure? be very sure? Or be damned sure?” Oops Student: “Falling isn’t something that typically happens, well, unless you’re me.” Professor T: Seven mothers get together and make a big salmonella salad…
Professor C: “My guess is, after you read the sample answers for the midterm exam almost every one of you will think you did really crappy.”
How I get you there…
Professor T: “And who decides this?” Student: “Well, I want to say the jury but I presume you’re going to tell me it’s a judge…” Professor T: “I would never presume to tell you anything. I’ll just ask you three times until you tell me it’s a judge.”
Witness prep:
Professor T: “As much as you want to prepare your witness, you know that on cross examination opposing counsel is going to have considerable latitude to push them off a cliff.”
Professor T: “And in the process of rehearsing them you record them, so you can play it back to them and show them how shift-eyed they are…”
Professor T: “…and one of his clients was a doctor who was ripped off, but he was the most arrogant, unpleasant… like you have to cut your wrists before you give him any money.”
Check your morals at the door
Professor T: “Does anyone have any problems with manipulating juries? (silence from the class)Great! Because otherwise you’re in the wrong place!”
So, the middle of the semester is already here. Oy vey.
And so is this weird thing called fall. The leaves are turning some pretty dramatic colors.
We keep our palms the same color all year in Miami, so this is pretty new. (I don’t really remember fall in Kansas…)
The coldest it has reached so far is 35 degrees. That morning I saw my own breath as I rode to school. Eek. I also saw a guy wearing shorts.
In 35 degrees.
Seriously.
I’m wearing two layers, gloves, a hat…and this dude is strolling to school in shorts. No. Fail. Fail-whale Fail. Rule of thumb: If you can see your own breath you shouldn’t wear shorts.
And no, this wasn’t some rugged northerner. He looked like he was about to cry.
For the most part it has been in the 50’s and misty. Sometimes the project towers near school are hard to see:
I ran into a few zombies near those towers yesterday afternoon. It was zombie weekend in Minneapolis. There were zombies on the train as well. Here are some pictures of the chaos.
I was stalked that night too. It was a little annoying. These three people followed us around the clubhouse all night apparently. Hm.
I was also approached at Target by some guy who said he saw my myspace and my website…which means he’s probably reading this. Hm. Hi? Don’t kill me. Thanks.
Seriously.
Don’t.
As far as class – CivPro is my favorite class. I’m all up in the kool-aid and it’s okay.
Legal writing is fun too, but it took me forever to figure out how to use Id. short cites for parallel citations. Yeah…
And now starts week 8…and the goal for this week is to shift back to coffee. I’ve been on a latte kick lately and I recently discovered the mocha…which yeah. Bad.
