Best Week Ever 12: Dog Days

It is Saturday night and my car glides through traffic on 494. Whip my Hair is on the radio and I am excited about tonight’s date. Things are awesome.

The awesomeness ends approximately 15 minutes later when I open my apartment door and get smacked by the smell of rotten eggs. Harley is sick and yarked everywhere.

I manage to clean up the copious amounts of yolk-like vomit, take the dogs out, drain the building boiler, and get dressed within 25 minutes. I am not going to be late for this date, dammit!

So of course, when I open the door to leave, I hear “BLARRG!”

Harley’s vomiting again.

I text the date, apologize for my tardiness, and then fling myself towards the new pools of vomit with my paper towel roll and spray bottle.

We eventually make it to the Elegance Drag Show at the Townhouse, just in time for Hammer Time:

There was also a super awkward moment when this old guy came on the stage during Mercedes Iman’s show and got on his knees. She smiled and sidestepped him.

And no, this wasn’t as epic as the barefoot grandpa and Madonna/Tila Tequila moment from the beginning of the semester.

Risup joined us halfway through the night and the post-drag-show dancing was a hilarious hot mess. At one point I laughed so hard I had to sit down. The Townhouse never disappoints.

Harley continued to ingratiate himself when I got home and I cleaned up vomit and diarrhea until 6am.

The lovefest continued this evening when he got tangled in a power cord and VAP:

Sigh. I tell myself this is practice for when I have kids.

The rest of my week consisted of work, dog walks around the lakes, and class. I spent almost the entirety of Thanksgiving in the library working on my Death Penalty paper. I left around 1am, but I was so glad that I finished.

I spent the majority of today cleaning up after the dogs, smoking up my apartment building with my cooking blunders, and running behind the dogs with a vacuum and bottle of Lysol. I got a little overwhelmed with the cleaning so I’ll try again tomorrow morning.

Tomorrow starts also starts a week of the post-date tango. The tango consists of having enough contact with your date to express your interest without coming on too strongly.

If a guy comes on too strongly he comes across as a Bedingfield and it’s time to move on. If the guy seems aloof then new suitors will take his place. We’ll see how this goes.