This should not have amused me as much as it did, but here is a funny warning label I came across downtown:
It looks like the voltage can give ninja kicks.
This should not have amused me as much as it did, but here is a funny warning label I came across downtown:
It looks like the voltage can give ninja kicks.
Here are some pictures I took of Saint Anthony Falls, which was (according to Wikipedia) the only major natural waterfall on the Mississippi.
Click the thumbnails to view larger versions.
More photography on No.634:
Domain anonymity: I have recommended using the domain upgrade feature from wordpress.com in the past. I used the wordpress domain upgrade feature when I first started this blog and I was happy with the service.
When I moved to hostmonster.com I saw an option to purchase “domain privacy” which is something that wordpress did not offer… and that is when I realized: Oh my god, my home address and phone number was public information for anyone who did a WHOIS search. Security breach!
I’m going to let all of you wordpress users finish hyperventilating.
What can you do? Well, I’m not sure if there is an answer other than switching to a domain provider that offers a privacy option.
The second, less scary, announcement is a little more techy and obscure. I’ve switched the permalinks around on this blog so a link like:
http://www.memosandmirth.com/?p=208
is now…
http://www.dennis-jansen.com/humor/legal-humor/on-the-record-civpro-conlaw-and-torts/
The old numerical links should forward. And it not… meh. Whatever.
It’s a SEO thing. Increases ad revenue and pays my bills. If your blog is hosted at wordpress.com then it should do this automatically.
A few minutes into my Conflicts class we heard a ringing sound from the hallway. Jill sits by the door, which has a window to the hallway:
Professor V: “What is that ringing sound?”
Jill: “I think it’s coming from the hallway.”
Professor V: “Hm.”
Jill (opening door): “It’s coming from out here, but I’m not sure what it is. Carbon Monoxide?”
Jack: “Is that a fire alarm?”
Professor V: “Probably not. Jill, let us know if you see flames.”
Jill: “Will do!”
A little Carbon Monoxide isn’t going to interrupt Conflicts.
Other Professor V posts:
…in which I become creepy “laughs to himself” guy.
I am sitting in the cafeteria area of the law school, reading for Conflicts.
It is hard to concentrate because two girls from my Tax Law class are seated two tables over. They are preparing for the midterm, and one of the girls has a booming voice.
Suddenly, I imagined her saying “SORRY. I CANNOT CONTROL THE VOLUME OF MY VOICE!”
And I bust out laughing.
Next time I consider writing a race-based post I am just going to look for Supreme Court opinions on point.
From today’s Conlaw reading:
Adarand Constructors v. Pena, 515 U.S. 200, 241 (U.S. 1995)
(STEVENS, J., dissenting). It is also true that “remedial” racial preferences may reflect “a desire to foster equality in society,” But there can be no doubt that racial paternalism and its unintended consequences can be as poisonous and pernicious as any other form of discrimination.
So-called “benign” discrimination teaches many that because of chronic and apparently immutable handicaps, minorities cannot compete with them without their patronizing indulgence.
Inevitably, such programs engender attitudes of superiority or, alternatively, provoke resentment among those who believe that they have been wronged by the government’s use of race. These programs stamp minorities with a badge of inferiority and may cause them to develop dependencies or to adopt an attitude that they are “entitled” to preferences.
And,
Grutter v. Bollinger, 539 U.S. 306, 349 (U.S. 2003)
(SCALIA) Still other suits may challenge the bona fides of the institution’s expressed commitment to the educational benefits of diversity that immunize the discriminatory scheme in Grutter. (Tempting targets, one would suppose, will be those universities that talk the talk of multiculturalism and racial diversity in the courts but walk the walk of tribalism and racial segregation on their campuses–through minority-only student organizations, separate minority housing opportunities, separate minority student centers, even separate minority-only graduation ceremonies.)
The university described in Scalia’s parenthetical reminds me a lot of the University of Miami, where there was a beast known as “minority life” which consisted of minority fraternal organizations, clubs, events, and a de facto minority dorm.
That was the backdrop for the 0L summer “I am not Tyrone” tirade post.
That was also why I didn’t apply to the minority Big Law summer internship program, which had a prompt akin to “Tell us your victimization story.”
Anyhoot. Back to Conlaw… this week is officially crunch time…
So I learned two things during the Minnesota Wild game:
1) I learned was how to use the action setting on my camera which takes automatic pictures. I had WELL over 800 pictures from that night.
I edited some of the pictures, but threw the rest in a flip-book like video:
And yes, that entire video is comprised of nothing but pictures. And yes, I am aware that the “E” from “Irreplaceable” is clipped in that video and I am not going to fix it. I am sure sasha fierce won’t mind.
And
2) Joel is as clumsy as I am:
I realize the song for the second video is grossly inappropriate for hockey. I first heard that song on a MTVU short, and spent an offensive amount of time tracking it down, so it had to be used.
Here are the rest of the pictures from the Minnesota Wild vs. Anaheim Ducks game. I took a ton of pictures of the sidelines and crowd because the facial expressions are priceless.
Click on the thumbnails to see the full sized picture:
I have mice in my apartment!
Well, either that or my upstairs neighbor started raising pigs…
I swear I saw a mouse dart across my kitchen floor a few days ago. I was mortified. As a Miamian, I am used to roaches and lizards, but not mice.
Que disgusting!
And loud!
At least roaches don’t scamper about and squeal. The noise has kept me up all night. I wake up to squeals from the kitchen, but of course the dog is useless. Bullmastiffs were OBVIOUSLY never used as hunting dogs.
I used to have a Dachshund. My dachshund would wake up if he heard anything squealing in the middle of the night, growl, and then hunt it down like a monster from Pandorum.
But no, not my dog.
First, he cannot hear anything over his snoring.
Second, when I do shake him awake like “OH MY GOD DO YOU HEAR THAT?” he opens his eyes, keeps snoring with his eyes open, and then rolls over like “bitch, I’m sleeping.”
USELESS! Absolutely useless!
So I tip-toed to the kitchen – where all the commotion is coming from – and I swear it sounds like Jerry Springer is holding a mouse session in the ceiling: squealing, slapping, and chairs being thrown… All of it.
But because the sound seems to come from the ceiling, I cannot rule out the possibility that my upstairs neighbor has a live pig or something in her kitchen. And no, that would not be strange in this apartment building…
Anyhoot, I am going to try to go back to bed. In the morning I may have to invest in some mouse traps, or get over my cat allergy…
Last class we filled out evaluations:
Professor A: “Thank you for filling out my teaching evaluations. They are being evaluated by the Afghanistan election commission so it’s going to take some time to get a result…”
Professor A, who practices at a fancy firm downtown, gives us practice tips:
Professor A: “Today’s practice tip: You can’t expect all of your clients to like you. You can only hope that they respect you.”
The professor then told us about a news story where a policeman’s wife had an affair with a doctor. The policeman found out, lured the doctor to his house, threatened to sue, and then demanded $150,000. The doctor gave the policeman $25,000, which did not constitute a gift.
Professor A: “The newspaper story did not say what the basis of the policeman’s threatened suit would be…but then again, only people from Arkansas know what their law is.”
I’m done with the female rowers after this. I promise. Seriously!
But I just love the facial expressions here:
Here are the rest of the images of the rowers. The first set is here.
At least Professor R is honest about the reading:
“You don’t need to read the mortgage financing forms word-for-word because if you’d try to you’d quickly go insane because they are really boring…”
Should have read your HUD booklet.
Professor E: “Mrs. Smith, do you remember getting your HUD special information booklet when you bought your house?”
Jill: “Uh, no. I don’t remember that at all. But I was young when I bought my house so I sort of rushed through it. I got totally screwed though…”
And the case quote of the day:
There is a group of inmates at the LCC who call themselves “the Peckerwoods.” This group of inmates has been identified by the facility as a security threat group. Gibbens v. Sabatka-Rine, D.Neb.,2009.
The Peckerwoods case involved a prisoner who had a lot of enemies in jail. He made most of these enemies before he got to the jail – he had ripped someone off, murdered someone else’s brother…
The prisoner was attacked by a member of the Peckerwoods gang in the prison kitchen and alleged that the warden was “deliberately indifferent to the serious risk of harm” that the Peckerwoods member posed to him.
His case was dismissed because he failed to show that the warden was aware that his attacker posed a threat to him.
The room for my Conflicts class always smells like snot.
So I am sitting in this snot-scented room 10 minutes before class. No one else is in the room yet.
The snot smell becomes oppressive, and I decide it is time for a freshness update. And gasp! Surprise, surprise! There is a can of Axe in my bag!
So I spray the Axe.
A minute later Jill walks in.
She puts her stuff down in the back of the room and then starts hacking. I turn around and Jill is running out of the room.
Jill: “Do you TASTE that?”
Me: “What?”
Jill: “Sorry.” (HACK) “Someone released a perfume bomb back there!”
Woops.
See also: The Best of Jill.
I was trying to take a picture of the plant, but someone decided he (and his junk) just needed to be part of the picture:
The Science Teaching center is still under construction.
When the building is finished there will be at least one professor who will consider throwing a brick through the building’s windows because the building obstructs his view of downtown Minneapolis and the Mississippi river.
I suspect there’s no hurry to finish the building before winter. During the weekends there are sometimes only two people working:
I discovered that the dog gets a little camera shy! This is incredibly convenient when I want him to stop staring at me when I’m eating:
Oh, and that is his kennel in the background! The kennel is under a table with a patterned table cloth. This makes the kennel invisible on those rare occasions where I actually shut the door.
99.54% of the time it’s as awkward as it looks in the video.
RSS/Facebook readers: click here if you cannot see the video.
It is 41 degrees outside (“feels like 34”) and raining, so of course the dog wakes me up:
Harley: “Time to go poopy!”
Me (looking outside): “Bitch please. Go back to sleep.”
Harley: “Poopy! Can’t wait. Noooow please.”
Me: “Fine, fine…5 more minutes…”
Harley: “The pudding can’t wait!”
Harley jumps off my bed and scampers off.
I’m putting my jeans on to take the dog out when a hear a toot from the living room.
Harley trots out of his kennel by the time I get there. There’s a big-steamy-pile of surprise in the kennel. Harley wags his tail until I start with the hysterics:
Me: “GOD DAMMIT! THIS IS UNFAIR! I WAS GETTING READY!”
Harley: “Unfair? Equity isn’t for those who sleep on their rights beyotch! Poopy couldn’t wait.”
I clean up the bullshit surprise and then put Harley’s leash on. He gives me a look like, “What’s that for? I’ve already relieved myself.”
Me: “I am not going to be the only one going outside in this plague weather!”
Harley: “But it’s coooold and wet!”
Me: “MY POINT EXACTLY!”
Five minutes later we are on the corner of the block and I’m trying to explain to Harley how he cannot both wake me up at an ungodly hour AND sass me for the crappy weather. My glares/mental rant are interrupted when I see Mel on the corner of the street.
I haven’t seen Mel since this summer. But tonight she was working the street – without an umbrella – standing on the corner looking wet and miserable.
Prostitutes on my block were everywhere this summer, but most of them had enough sense to take their work inside once the weather started to turn. But not Mel! Rain or shine, Mel is always in business. She’s on that USPS level.
I give Mel a look like “it’s time to invest in an umbrella or reconsider your career choices.”
She glares.
The dog snorts at her and we walk off.
I was studying on the couch and got up to get more coffee. When I returned, I found that I had lost my place:
And I realize that it doesn’t look like it, but there’s actually enough room on the couch for both of us.
Real Estate Law: Professor E on title searches:
Professor E: “There are people who just love to do title searches. To them it’s just a huge puzzle and they love the history involved! But most people would rather shoot themselves…”
My tax professor’s asides:
Professor A: “Part of what started this stink was smartass business school professors…”
Professor A: “I’m sorry I’m not my usual sparkling self. I spent a long weekend in Boston eating way too much seafood…”