The semester is over! Now I am busy working full time at the office and pummeling through the snow with the dogs.
Here’s an outline of what happened these past few months:
It is usually easy to tell when a crazy dog person “animal fan” approaches you at the lake. For example:
The lady in the blue coat has red flags all over her. If someone is already cooing over someone else’s dog, they will likely do the same with your dogs.
Oh the majestic stacks:
That’s the view from Hanson Hall, which is part of the business school and has a full-service Starbucks. I love it best during the winter.
Timing is essential at the Hanson Hall Starbucks because the line is 30-people deep between classes. Nothing is worse than waiting in a flock of undergrad business majors.
A historic storm hit Minneapolis last night. There were 60mph wind gusts which made the evening dog walk feel like being simultaneously cast in a Willow Smith video and a dramatic scene from Harry Potter.
The bulk of the storm was last night, but this morning’s commute was still windy and filled with that soggy type of snow that doesn’t stick. Jill caught me running out of the school parking garage in this plague weather.
I think she’s being dramatic.
Harley’s unimpressed.
Winter walks are always entertaining:
Someone left a note on my car a few days ago:
Now I expect a note every time I go to my car!
And yes, I was blocking the curb cut, but the curb cut was not shoveled, so I could not see it when I parked.
I don’t know why anyone would care about an unshoveled curb cut, but I am just glad all the snow on the car was white.
I checked weather.com this morning and let’s just say the “winter storm warning” is in all caps and the word blizzard was mentioned. Maybe we are getting another Snowmageddon?
Good news is that the bullshit storm starts TOMORROW, so I have one day of non-weather-chaos.
If I wrote about how I really feel right now, my law school career counselor would probably let out a primal scream and assault me in the hallway.
So, no profanity editorializing – I am just going to state the facts:
Methinks it’s winter now.
Update (post dog walk): so, I officially scrapped tonight’s plans of outlining tax law. Tonight’s new project is teaching Harley how to use a litter box.
The weight of the snow causes mini avalanches from the trees. It feels like the trees are chucking snow down on the sidewalk out of bitterness like “WHY IS THERE SNOW ON ME? I STILL HAVE LEAVES DAMMIT!”
So, I felt like the star of my own video game! I am Super Mario with a golf umbrella and sack of dog poop. The object of the game was to hop around the neighborhood without getting dumped on by the trees. 1up my people!
It was a lot of fun. I take back all my bitching about the snow….which is only getting worse by the way:
It is 5:30am. I have been asleep for exactly 3 hours.1
I wake up because I feel hot dragon dog breath on my cheek. I open my eyes and glare at Harley.
Harley (nudging me): “I need to go pooooooop.”
Me: “It’s snowing outside. I need sleep.”
Harley: “And I need to release! I need a walk. Now.”
Me: “Nono, you don’t understand. It is cold and SNOWING outside! Hold it! BACK TO BED!”
Harley: “Pooopy time. 5:30 a.m. is POOOPY time!”
Me: “Seriously it is SNOWING!”
Harley: “Listen. You have two options: let your balls drop, get off your ass, and take me outside, or kennel me and mop up my brown river of stink tomorrow.”
Me: “I will kill you.”
So when we get outside…
…Harley stops and looks at me like,
Harley: “Wait! It’s gross and cold…”
Me: “SEE! I told you so! God dammit! I told you so!”
Harley: “I’m a dog. I can’t actually understand a word you say to me.”
Me: “Understand this: you dragged me out of bed and I’m murderous. YOU BETTA SHIT.”
He certainly understood that.
Here are some the wallpapers that I have in rotation at the moment. With the exception of the first wallpaper, the wallpapers consist of photos taken by me in Minneapolis and are sized at 1440×900.
This past week was hilarious for all the wrong reasons.
The week started with me randomly getting a car. I have never bought a car by myself before, so I didn’t know how long the financing process would take. I thought it would take a few weeks. It took about 10 minutes.
The gist:
Me: “Hi. I’m a law student who just got a job in the suburbs. Busing won’t cut it anymore, and I haven’t learned how to fly…”
Banker: “Got any cars in mind?”
Me: “Yep! I am eying a car at BigChain car dealership. It’s an Altima.”
Banker: “Do you have a number for the dealership?”
Me: “Yep. I filled out a form and Rick Salesman sent me an email, the number is 612-000-0000.”
Banker: “Please hold.”
Banker: “Okay. I’ve cleared everything with the car dealership. You’re approved for the loan. Just login to your online account and check “yes.” There is an e-check you can print out to get your car tonight.”
Me: “Wait, what? Tonight? Really?”
Banker: “Yep. Let me know if you have any problems.”
Click. I didn’t even have time to call mom before the car dealership called:
Salesman: “Hey, this is Rick Salesman from BigChain. We’ve emailed. I just talked to your bank.”
Me: “Uh…yeah…hi. Sorry about that. I didn’t think they were going to call you immediately…or even approve the loan that quickly.”
Salesman: “Yep. BigBank works quick.”
Me: “They sure do.”
Salesman: “So when are you coming to test drive?”
Me: “Well the problem is that I don’t have a car. So I have to find a ride…maybe tomorrow...”
Salesman: “Oh don’t worry about that. I’ll pick you up. You can test drive it back to the dealership. I’ll be there in 25 minutes.”
Yikes! I guess there isn’t a recession going on! Or, maybe so few people are buying that they are eager to sell to any non-sketchy person they can find. Hm. I really wanted the car, but I didn’t expect it to happen so quickly…
So I enjoyed the wonders of winter-car-ownership this week. Miami didn’t prepare me for any of this:
The city of Minneapolis and I had a fight yesterday, to the amusement of my entire neighborhood…
The city plowed my street while I was at Big Box. I returned to find my driveway blocked by a wall of snow. I underestimated the amount of snow because when I tried to drive over the wall I got stuck!
After a few minutes of colorful language and a odd-burning smell, I decided I had to shovel. So I climbed over the mound of snow and fetched a shovel from the house.
I spent the next 15 minutes extricating my car: shoveling some, trying to reverse, getting back out to shovel some more, trying again…ugh.
I finally got the car back onto the street like “Oh Sweet Glory!” But I didn’t want to get stuck again, so I left my car in the street to frantically clear my driveway.
As people pulled up behind my car I signaled them to pass while mouthing the word “SORRY!” When my neighbors saw what was going on, and a few pointed and laughed. I’m here to entertain. Welcome to the Jansen show.
